tips for mom that actually work

thought new moms might like these tips im trying them out myself and the one iv tried has already worked

That newborn of yours took a while to figure out the difference between night and day -- and you expected this. But you didn't anticipate that his whole first year could leave you feeling like you got a job working the graveyard shift. If sleep deprivation has you weeping into your coffee mug, take heart: It's possible to put an end to those 2 a.m. wake-up calls. "After 4 months, a baby's natural preference is to sleep," says clinical social worker Jennifer Waldburger, coauthor of The Sleep-Easy Solution. "He just doesn't always know how to stay asleep. But even bad habits are usually fixable in just a few days." Use our advice to sort out what's keeping your baby up at night.
Slumber-buster: Your baby loses his paci again and again, waking him often.

Sleep-through solution: By 8 months, most Binky babies have the fine motor skills to put their paci back in their mouth -- a good thing since experts say using a nighttime pacifier can reduce the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) during the first year. "Until then, your choice is either to get rid of the pacifier altogether, or to let your baby cry it out in the middle of the night," says Janet K. Kennedy, Ph.D., founder of NYC Sleep Doctor, a sleep-consultation service. She's helped many babies with this problem, including her own daughter when she was 5 months old. "From 4 to 5:30 a.m., we were constantly going to her room to put in her paci, so I finally just let her cry it out. It took a couple of days and was really brutal at first, but she was eventually able to go to sleep with a pacifier and then not need it again."
Slumber-buster: Slight noises -- even you clicking off a lamp -- wake your baby.
Sleep-through solution: Use a white-noise machine or a fan to create a gentle hum that masks other sounds. "A whooshing white noise becomes a sleep association," says Dr. Kennedy. "If you turn it on as part of your baby's bedtime routine, it'll cue her to relax and go to sleep." Don't want to buy a noise machine? Search online for "white noise MP3s" for downloadable sound tracks, like one of a hair dryer.

Slumber-buster: It's 4 a.m., but your baby's ready to play.

Sleep-through solution: If she's going through a developmental growth spurt, like learning to crawl, she may be too excited about practicing her new skill to quickly fall back asleep. Be firm about the fact that nighttime is not the time to play. "One night Alyssa awoke, wanting to cruise from one side of the crib to the other," says Stephanie Gaczewski, of Darien, Illinois. "After a few moments, I left the room. She whined a little but soon stopped." If your baby is chatting and cooing, ignore her. "Hopefully, she'll entertain herself until she decides to go back to sleep," says Waldburger. But if she's crying, your baby may be experiencing separation anxiety, which usually comes with new motor development. When this happens more than 30 minutes before her typical wake-up time, soothe her for a few minutes, tell her you'll see her soon, then leave the room.

Slumber-buster: Nursing is the only way your baby will go back to sleep.

Sleep-through solution: The one thing that seemed to soothe her colicky daughter was nursing, but before long, Jonna Rubin, of Framingham, Massachusetts, felt like an all-night diner. Finally, her pediatrician suggested putting the baby down sleepy but awake, then checking in every three minutes until she nodded off. Amazingly, she conked out after just five minutes, no feeding necessary. In fact, 90 percent of 6-month-olds can sleep through the night without snacking, says clinical social worker Kim West, author of 52 Sleep Secrets for Babies. Once you get the green light from your pediatrician to cease night feedings, you can slowly reduce them. If she's getting multiple bottles, eliminate one at a time over a four-day period. You can also try decreasing the amount of formula in each bottle. When she realizes that milk is no longer on the menu, your baby will stop angling for it.

Slumber-buster: You rush to your baby's side before he wakes his sibling.Sleep-through solution: Running to your baby the second he sniffles can make him depend on your presence to fall back asleep. But it's hard to let him fuss if you're worried he'll wake the rest of the household. Try warning an older sib in advance: "Jonah may cry at night, but he's just trying to learn to sleep all night." When the baby wakes up and so does your older child, soothe your big kid first. He's more likely to fall back asleep without a ton of added help, and you'll give the baby a chance to settle himself before soothing him. If you're in the thick of sleep training and anticipate a few grueling nights, consider sending an older sibling to Grandma's during this time.

Snooze Schedule Follow this first-year guide to your baby's nighttime zzz's to find out how many hours of p.m. sleep she needs at every age.

1 week old: 8 hours. Babies can sleep 16 to 18 hours a day. Half is at night.6 weeks: 8.5 hours. Nighttime sleep finally begins to solidify.3 months: 9 hours. You'll see a hint of a schedule. Move bedtime up.6 months: 10 hours. Now is the best time to sleep-train your little one.9 months: 11 hours. If she needs it, reteach your baby how to go to sleep.12 months: 12 hours. Still not sleeping? Ask your pediatrician for advice. Originally published in the November 2010 issue of Parents magazine.

sleep mistakes parents make 

Skipping the bedtime routineMost people need time to wind down before bed, and babies are no different. A bedtime routine will not only help your little one get into relaxation mode before being placed in his crib, but it can also serve as a wonderful bonding experience for both of you."A bedtime routine is an easy strategy that makes a world of difference in how quickly your baby will settle to sleep and how much support he'll need to fall asleep," says Megan Faure, author of The BabySense Secret. "As time- consuming or rigid as it may feel, it saves you time and energy in the long run." One hour before you want your baby asleep (6 to 7 P.M. is an appropriate bedtime for your baby or toddler), begin your routine. Close the curtains, dim the room, and prepare his bottle and story. A warm bath can help soothe him, and when it's over, take him straight to his room and dress him in the darkened room with a lullaby CD. Read a story and then feed him in your arms. Once he is finished, settle him into a sleepy state and then put him to bed awake, but drowsy.

Putting him to sleep wherever you are No one wants to be a slave to her child's sleep schedule, but the simple truth is that naps in thestroller, in the car seat, or in the high chair do not provide your baby with the sleep he needs. "Motion sleep keeps the brain in a light sleep, so the child isn't falling into a deep, restful slumber," says West.To develop good sleep habits, your baby should have a familiar sleep zone, a space where he goes to sleep for naps and bedtime at the same time each day. You can work around this rule in the case of important events and appointments, but most of the time you should stay consistent. Try to run errands in between naps. And if you are going out at night, get a babysitter or a family member (that's what grannies are for!) to help out so your baby isn't falling asleep overtired in an unfamiliar environment.

Not sticking with a sleep scheduleConsistency is key with children, especially when it comes to sleep, says West. "They need regular naptimes and reasonably regular bedtimes to regulate day and night hormone cycles--and their little hearts and minds need the predictability to feel secure."Dr. Meltzer agrees: "Sleep schedules are very important for setting our internal clocks. A consistent sleep schedule will help a child get sleepy and fall asleep around the same time every day. If the schedule is constantly changing it's like flying back and forth across time zones every night; the body doesn't know when to fall asleep. Bedtime struggles often result from an inconsistent schedule as parents may be trying to put their children to bed too early (when the child isn't tired) or too late (when the child is overtired)."Of course, there's room for some flexibility. Some days your child will nap more, and others she will nap less. "As you learn to read her sleep cues and recognize her sleep windows, you'll be able to adjust the schedule more easily," says West. If your little one is content, you've probably got a good sleep schedule going on. If she's fussy and demanding, she may need longer naps, an earlier bedtime, a later wake-up, or all of the above.

Letting them stay up late, hoping they'll sleep in It sounds like a good idea--after all, when teens go to bed late, don't they want to sleep until noon the next day? Unfortunately, that just doesn't work for little ones "Again, the internal clock is a powerful force that typically wakes young children up around the same time every morning, no matter what time they go to sleep at night," says Dr. Meltzer. "So parents who lets their child stay up late are simply asking for an overtired child the next day." Instead, keep a set bedtime to make sure your child gets the 10 to 11 hours of sleep he needs each night.And if your little one is getting up way too early (before 6 A.M.), it's probably a sign that your child is going to bed too late, so try putting him to bed 30 minutes or even an hour earlier.  Mom and Dad aren't on the same page"Parents must be a united front when it comes to improving their child's sleep," says West. "You need to agree on what tactic you're going to use to help your child learn to self-soothe and get a good night's rest. It's okay for your routines to be slightly different--Dad might like to read a few books at bedtime and Mom reads only one--but the big decisions need to be agreed upon in advance."Those decisions include what time Baby needs to go to sleep and whether you?re going to rely on any sleep crutches to get her to sleep. That means one parent can't decide rocking the baby to sleep is A-OK if the other parent doesn't want to do it at bedtime and throughout the night. Sit down together and figure out what works for both of you. And if one of you (hello, Mom) is getting up more than the other, then what makes that parent most comfortable should take precedence. Remember: Being consistent every night is imperative to the sleep process.all info from This advice is based on a fallacy--that babies are incapable of falling to sleep on their own. My Mom is an This advice is based on a fallacy--that babies are incapable of falling to sleep on their own. My Mom is an 

executive nanny who has often been hired solely to help infants sleep through the night. She advocates the Eat-Play-Sleep routine of the book, Baby Wise. Swaddling to give baby security also helps calm them. Never let them fall 
asleep on the bottle. Do we eat dinner in bed till we pass out? Its not good for digestion, much less, future habits. 
Feed them last an hour before bed, help them spend their energy in play, then wrap them snug and lay them in crib fully awake. They will be much less dependent on you and you won't have to disrupt the whole family by creating some sleepy-time atmosphere with reading, bathing and soft music for an hour before bed. My son is nearly one and goes to sleep on his own without a fuss. executive nanny who has often been hired solely to help infants sleep through the night. She advocates the Eat-Play-Sleep routine of the book, Baby Wise. Swaddling to give baby security also helps calm them. Never let them fall 
asleep on the bottle. Do we eat dinner in bed till we pass out? Its not good for digestion, much less, future habits. 
Feed them last an hour before bed, help them spend their energy in play, then wrap them snug and lay them in crib fully awake. They will be much less dependent on you and you won't have to disrupt the whole family by creating some sleepy-time atmosphere with reading, bathing and soft music for an hour before bed. My son is nearly one and goes to sleep on his own without a fu This advice is based on a fallacy--that babies are incapable of falling to sleep on their own. My Mom is an This advice is based on a fallacy--that babies are incapable of falling to sleep on their own. My Mom is an This advice is based on a fallacy--that babies are incapable of falling to sleep on their own. My Mom is an all http://www.parents.com/baby/sleep/issues/sleep-mistakes-baby-how-to-get-baby-to-sleep/#page=11

executive nanny who has often been hired solely to help infants sleep through the night. She advocates the Eat-Play-Sleep routine of the book, Baby Wise. Swaddling to give baby security also helps calm them. Never let them fall 
asleep on the bottle. Do we eat dinner in bed till we pass out? Its not good for digestion, much less, future habits. 
Feed them last an hour before bed, help them spend their energy in play, then wrap them snug and lay them in crib fully awake. They will be much less dependent on you and you won't have to disrupt the whole family by creating some sleepy-time atmosphere with reading, bathing and soft music for an hour before bed. My son is nearly one and goes to sleep on his own without a fuss.

executive nanny who has often been hired solely to help infants sleep through the night. She advocates the Eat-Play-Sleep routine of the book, Baby Wise. Swaddling to give baby security also helps calm them. Never let them fall 
asleep on the bottle. Do we eat dinner in bed till we pass out? Its not good for digestion, much less, future habits. 
Feed them last an hour before bed, help them spend their energy in play, then wrap them snug and lay them in crib fully awake. They will be much less dependent on you and you won't have to disrupt the whole family by creating some sleepy-time atmosphere with reading, bathing and soft music for an hour before bed. My son is nearly one and goes to sleep on his own without a fuss.

executive nanny who has often been hired solely to help infants sleep through the night. She advocates the Eat-Play-Sleep routine of the book, Baby Wise. Swaddling to give baby security also helps calm them. Never let them fall 
asleep on the bottle. Do we eat dinner in bed till we pass out? Its not good for digestion, much less, future habits. 
Feed them last an hour before bed, help them spend their energy in play, then wrap them snug and lay them in crib fully awake. They will be much less dependent on you and you won't have to disrupt the whole family by creating some sleepy-time atmosphere with reading, bathing and soft music for an hour before bed. My son is nearly one and goes to sleep on his own without a fuss.

This advice is based on a fallacy--that babies are incapable of falling to sleep on their own. My Mom is an  This advice is based on a fallacy--that babies are incapable of falling to sleep on their own. My Mom is an all info from al
executive nanny who has often been hired solely to help infants sleep through the night. She advocates the Eat-Play-Sleep routine of the book, Baby Wise. Swaddling to give baby security also helps calm them. Never let them fall 
asleep on the bottle. Do we eat dinner in bed till we pass out? Its not good for digestion, much less, future habits. 
Feed them last an hour before bed, help them spend their energy in play, then wrap them snug and lay them in crib fully awake. They will be much less dependent on you and you won't have to disrupt the whole family by creating some sleepy-time atmosphere with reading, bathing and soft music for an hour before bed. My son is nearly one and goes to sleep on his own without a fuss. 
executive nanny who has often been hired solely to help infants sleep through the night. She advocates the Eat-Play-Sleep routine of the book, Baby Wise. Swaddling to give baby security also helps calm them. Never let them fall 
asleep on the bottle. Do we eat dinner in bed till we pass out? Its not good for digestion, much less, future habits. 
Feed them last an hour before bed, help them spend their energy in play, then wrap them snug and lay them in crib fully awake. They will be much less dependent on you and you won't have to disrupt the whole family by creating some sleepy-time atmosphere with reading, bathing and soft music for an hour before bed. My son is nearly one and goes to sleep on his own without a fuss.

This advice is based on a fallacy--that babies are incapable of falling to sleep on their own. My Mom is an 
executive nanny who has often been hired solely to help infants sleep through the night. She advocates the Eat-Play-Sleep routine of the book, Baby Wise. Swaddling to give baby security also helps calm them. Never let them fall 
asleep on the bottle. Do we eat dinner in bed till we pass out? Its not good for digestion, much less, future habits. 
Feed them last an hour before bed, help them spend their energy in play, then wrap them snug and lay them in crib fully awake. They will be much less dependent on you and you won't have to disrupt the whole family by creating some sleepy-time atmosphere with reading, bathing and soft music for an hour before bed. My son is nearly one and goes to sleep on his own without a fuss.

birth WITH fear my labor and delivery story

 ATHENA MARIE DEGEL 04-05-2012

 nearly 4 months later looking back on the  days of April 4th and 5th its not as much of a blur as it used to be on the 3rd the doc had me do a 24 hour urine culture or what ever its called to see if i was getting pre-eclampsia which after the snotty nurse at the hospital said well you have a little high blood pressure but your doctor isn't on call this weekend so we are going to send you home  to do this urine thing bring it back in 24 hours and we will see if you actually do have it so i did that and i took it back and not even 24 hours later i was cleaning up around the house when i got a call from my ob/gyn and said you do in fact have the on start of pre-eclampsia so we are going to induce you before it becomes full blown  so get to the l/d asap so i called tony and told him we needed to get to the hospital so he left work and we got things together no i didn't have everything ready i had Athena's bag packed but not mine  so i in a rush got my things together and waited for tony . By the time we got to the hospital it was around 7ish i had called my dad my mom and everyone else who wanted to be called ,they checked me in and got me hooked up to a million iv tubes i had to be put on magnesium,and pitosin  which i knew would make me labor harder then it would have been naturally they told me i could get the epidural if i needed it when the contractions became unbearable the contractions weren't so bad at first but then they started getting worse much worse when they checked me i was 3 or 4 at this point all i wanted to do was sleep because i had seen enough shows and done enough reading to know if i didn't enough rest i wouldn't have enough strength to push so i told tony i needed it he said is it that bad and any woman who is at the point of exhaustion just want to slap their husband when they ask them that but i didn't  i told him yes the nurse came in and checked me and said that i was the same and i should try and wait till i couldn't handle it any more really i wouldnt have asked for it if i could handle it because i had always said i would as long as i could with out pain meds because i know that there is a chance they can slow down labor but i told the nurse that i couldnt handle it anymore so she got the epidural guy in and believe it or not it didnt hurt  all that bad i guess being a gestational diabetic who had to give herself insulin shots twice a day  and having so many tattoos built up my tolerance for needles but i digress after that i tried to get some sleep i got some and then everyone showed up and we all visited and it didnt look like athena was going to be making an appearence any time soon so i sent a couple people home except those who refused to go home mom,dad,grammy and in what seemed like minutes it was time to push lol so i had to call back the people who insisted they had to be there for the birth even though it would only be tony in the room with me so even though i was at a 10 i had to wait for my doc because she wanted to be there through all the pushing not just the delivery  and thankfully she was there im not sure if the outcome would have been the same otherwise about that time i started to feel alot of pain and i couldnt understand why and the docs said i couldnt get any more epidural and the pain was mostly in one spot so almost an hour later my doctor shows up and at this point i was feeling pretty much every thing it took what seemed like hours to push and i think it was about an hour then i got to the point every mother fears i had lost hope that i could push my baby out tony was there the whole time holding my hand and telling me i could do it i kept crying telling him i couldn't do it i was sorry but i couldn't but no madder what tony kept telling me i could then i was told  her head was out they told me to push and i kept trying by this time i know i was screaming im sure i was scarring the hell out of the other women in labor ,then all of a sudden i was told to stop pushing and any woman who has watched birthing shows knows that that's not a good thing  i later found out Athena's shoulders had gotten stuck and because her head was already out they couldn't push her back in and do an emergency c-section and that i had to have an epeasiodomy which is a cut to allow the baby more room to come out well from that i tore 2 more times so basically i tore from hole to hole ,the next thing i knew i had 2 nurses on top of my stomach pushing down on it to try and get athena out which is the worst pain i had ever felt,they finally got Athena out and started to stitch me up  which i felt as well tony went to check on Athena who i hadn't even seen yet all i had seen was out of the corner of me eye a really big baby being worked on and while at that point things became a little blurry i didn't hear crying at first and to this day i don't know if she cried right away but i was told later that she had fluid in her lungs and needed a little help breathing and they told me that when i did see her not to be alarmed which when someone tells you that you are automatically alarmed they said she was a little bruised from being so big and being pushed out a small birth canal but that the swelling would go down and it did within a few days she looked like a normal 8lb baby .when they brought her out and were pushing her to the nicu my family saw her for a brief second but didn't think that the big baby who was swollen and bruised was indeed Athena and since she was in the nicu they could only see her through the glass at a far ,and for the first 24 hours only tony had gotten up close and personal with our little angel i got to see her the next day and thankfully she started to eat enough that she was allowed to go home with me after 3 days in the hospital and we left the hospital on Easter Sunday .and while i wish my labor and delivery would have been easier im glad i did get to deliver my daughter vaginally and even against my own choice naturally oh and in case you were wondering what i mean and why i felt everything its because when the nurses moved me around on the bed my epidural came out of my back and we didn't find out till the next day when they went to take it out anyway and the nurse said "oh look its already out " but any way i got to experience every aspect of labor and delivery except c-section which i was told is what i will have to have the next time i have a baby unless the baby is premature and known to be less then 7 lbs . i later had to have another surgery to fix the stitches that had been put in after her birth because they had got infected and broken down ,and nearly 4 months later i still have to use stool softeners every so often so that i don't tear something or cause bleeding  internally from trying to push a bowl movement out i know tmi but its a reality i will have to deal with for a long time but it was all worth it and i would do it again as long as i got my daughter in the end ,being a mother has changed me in a big way Athena is the light of my life and she makes everyone smile shes the piece of the puzzle that had been missing from mine and tony life ,even if she is my only child i know that i did and will continue to do everything i can for her .

mommy fears

As i look at Athena sleeping i see so much of tony and myself ,she sleeps all over the place like i do ,she can sleep through a protest or a tornado like tony can,she also talks in her sleep like tony does,but at the same time she has her own personality,she looks so peaceful when she sleeps ,when she sleeps she smiles and coo's ,whenever she see;s a picture of tony and i she just stares and smiles like she knows who's in the picture ,like she was born knowing what we looked like,like the moment  she opened her eyes and looked at us, the look on her face was i know you your my mom and dad,we may have not known what she would look like but she already knew what we looked like,the sound of our voice's and the warmth of our touch . My biggest fear as a mom is not being able to protect her like i could when she was inside me ,when i go back to work i can no longer just go check on her when ever i want i can no longer "know" that shes ok,and safe,i cant just hold her and have all my fears just melt away ,but i will have to face that fear and know that the person i have watch her has her best interest at heart will take care of her just like i would even though no on can do as good a job as me lol .my fears are those of many new moms and as the days,and weeks pass i will learn how to do this whole mom thing i can only hope that i raise my daughter in a way that will make god,and my daughter happy .

mommy

MOMMY

"mom" its the word i will be called from now on weather it's Athena calling my name or me telling her "because im the mom" lol.being a mom is the most rewarding job i could ever ask for,it has long hours and very few if no breaks,but the payment is the love of my daughter and that's all the payment i need.I choose this job and this life , I will no longer get to sleep in ,take a vacation on a whim,and come and go as i please.i gave up my young adult life for the life of motherhood, and being a wife,but i don't look at it as giving up something i look at it as trading up for something better ,i had my fun when i was a teenager and while it might not have been the age i should have been having fun and being young and crazy it allowed me to grow up and be ready to be a wife and mom at 21,for me i traded a life only worrying about me for a life where everything i do effects my daughter,and everything i do is for my daughter.my life may not be what every 21 year olds life is but its the life i wanted and chose and i wouldn't change my life for anything 

breastfeeding myths answered

thought some of you would like this 

Breastfeeding is one of those topics where women are very divided – some mothers highly encourage it and others never even consider it. Co-founders of Best for Babes (a foundation aiming to alter the cultural perception of breastfeeding and beat the breastfeeding “booby traps”) Bettina Forbes and Danielle Rigg are hoping to change all that. On today’s episode of “the Shine” Bettina and Danielle speak candidly about the breastfeeding experience including the best ways for moms to prepare, the benefits, and most of all, how they are on a mission to make people more supportive and embracing of breastfeeding.

3 monthes

 so my little girl is 3 months old now i cant believe the time has flown by so fast and she still amazes me every day .she even starting to sleep through the night well mostly but i dont mind 5 am feedings it gives me a little time to spend with her before the hustle and bustle of the day has started.i finally got her a bumbo so she can practice sitting up and shes about to meet her second and third cousins this weekend which is exciting and within the next month she will have her own room and i cant wait to decorate it all pink and girly the path in front of our family is long but i see the light at the end of the tunnel and i know that no madder what my family will prosper my little girl will grow up with what we never had a 2 parent family and she will never feel as though shes not loved if anything she will be loved by every person who meets her and she already is theres not a person that meets her that isnt amazed by how cute,smart,amazing and happy she is i know that in one way or the other my daughter will make the world a better place .

2.5 months

Athena is now 2 and a half months old she smiles all the time if put on her stomach she rolls over and has even started sleeping through most of the night only waking up 2 times a night max shes eating more and more at a time and is a whopping 11lbs at least .i have finally gotten her to start sleeping in other places other then her swing she is even sleeping in her crib as we speak hopefully it will continue even though every time i have her sleeping in her crib i find it is me that doesn't sleep and i constantly check on her my biggest fear is of course sids so for the first 2 years of her life i will find my self listening for her breaths, and watching her stomach rise and descend ,even messing with her lips till she moves them. i know to most people it is silly but i am a first time mom so i will be as silly as i want .so many things are going on in the next few months we are moving to a bigger house we have yet to decide if we want to buy a mobile home or rent another home either way it will need to be at least a 2 bedroom home i love my daughter to death but sharing a room with her is becoming quite cramped im sure i have stubbed my toes and slammed my hip into the bed post at least a dozen times .i dont know what the next couple months hold for my family but we will take it head on .